After brief snatches of sleep, it takes a moment for me to recall where I am. Sluggish, I recognise my surroundings. The house we’d recently moved to. My wife, Michelle sleeping beside me. Our bedroom would have to be redecorated. Thinking about the past was good as far as it went. But I needed to instil a fearless frame of mind.

I’m ragged and serious today as I drive to the Clementine Churchill Hospital with Michelle for my scans. After checking in at the reception, I wait only a short time for the MRI scan. In the scanning room, I take my top off and lay on my back. The bench slides into the scanner and clunks to a halt. Despite the electronic buzzes, beeps, pulsating and thuds over the next hour, I manage to remain still and go into a trance-like state. When the drugs are injected through the…

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